castle on a cloud

i've had quite the busy fast few days. obviously. i've been pretty MIA from this little booger.

saturday was a blast. liz and I went into Camden (incidentally very close to regent's park--where i'm staying) for the afternoon because we were going to see a show. the band Every Avenue played at "The Underworld," a venue underneath a moderately famous pub called "The World's End." We waited in line for about an hour but cut in front of the entire line because some really nice mom with an ugly daughter and her ugly friends were waiting in line and she just let us cut. too sweet. not trying to be mean about these girls but seriously. woah. and what are the odds that I would see one of them whilst walking around Leicester Square today (2 days later). slim. but it happened.

i had never heard of the 2 opening bands so we decided to leave the show and get drinks up at the pub above. i had my first Snakebite (beer mixed with grenadine). IT WAS AWESOME. except it was wicked awkward when I went to order one last night and the poor kid behind the counter didn't understand what I was saying because apparently they didn't serve them at this other pub. whatEVER. the show turned out to be a blast. they seemed to have a lot of energy as it was their last night abroad. I attempted to hang with them by introducing myself as a friend of one of their friends but I was either the least attractive girl in the history of the planet or they simply did not have any interest in speaking to me. perhaps a combination of the two. nevertheless, liz and I went home early. at least we tried. someone fell (or mayyybe was pushed) onto the train tracks that go from central london to surrey and died :( the train was delayed.

sunday was my last morning with the brodericks. it was spent watching the season finale of LOST (on DVR), which I will not go into details hating on right here because my mother is reading and she has respectfully requested that I refrain from any specifics but can I just leave it as FUCK YOU LOST, I HATE YOU (sorry for the swear words mama, love you). but seriously. worst end to a great thing. worse than when Frodo and Bilbo sailed off into another world. that was so sad. stupid lost. what a waste of 137 minutes. (yes it was that long and the UK shows less commercials than in the states.)

i had to repack my absurd suitcase, mr. B brought it down the stairs (strong like ox I told him) and luckily it fit in the car. liz and her mom spent about 30 minutes trying to figure out the easiest way for her to drive me into the city to get to my campus. I'm not going to lie, I was fighting back tears when I said goodbye to her.

I was guided to my dorm and then up to my room which I share with 2 girls, Melissa and Becca. Melissa is from outside of Richmond, a rising 3rd year History major who is taking this class "just for fun." Becca is a rising 4th year from Leesburg majoring in Sociology and MY NEW BEST FRIENDDDD. i was informed that i would love her (she's in the same sorority as some of my friends) but you can never be positive. she's the funniest human being alive (right up there with my new aforementioned English friend Jackie). we all bonded pretty quickly and then bought food from the Refectory (aka the dining hall) and ate in a picnic forum in Regent's Park. i got 2 spider bites. I am in pain.

we then explored the area briefly. a bunch of the kids and the precious married program admins were going to a nearby pub so we hung there for a bit and came home. in an attempt to bond with the campus better Becca, my name rhyme bff Kelsey, and my new friend Kayla and I went down to the "lounge." it consists of 6 computers and a TV that shows 6 stations, none of which are "the good ones." we settled on Robin Hood (the one with Kevin Costner) until a girl said her friend was bringing down The Hangover (scoreeee!!) that never happened (bitch) so we just talked shit about her and went hunting for vending machines. that turned out to be a hilarious journey because neither of the 2 we found would let Becca buy the Doritos because they were "sold out" (but they weren't because...they weren't) and Kayla's weird English Gatorade Drink was leaving out of some invisible hole. we then nicked an italian food menu from the guys at the front desk and proceeded to read aloud the strange foods and heinous spelling and grammatical errors. disgusting British food that we would never eat includes "brown sauce" (can we bit a touch more specific?), "burger sauce" (this will never happen) and "doner meat" (def just threw up a lil bit). the grammar issues are too irritating to list.

the night ended around 11pm when we all got sick of our menu and kevin costner. i woke up at 2am with the taste of gross chemicals in my mouth (still not sure what that was all about...) and then again at 4, 430, 5, 530, 6, 645, 715, and finally at 815 when I meant to. that sucked. first night in a new, twin bed (which chemicals in my mouth apparently).

today was craaaaazy busy. we got up at 8:15, down to breakfast at 9:20, college orientation at 10, class at 11, quick tour at 1145, picked up snacks for the day and Becca and Kelsey bought European cell phones, lunch at 12:30, and then all met at the Tube station at 1pm.

we first went to St. Paul's Cathedral where I walked approximately 400 billion steps to the very top. after some quick but lovely picture taking I decided not to push my luck with the whole "fear of heights" business and make my way back down to the main hall of the cathedral where I had to take lots of pictures in stealth mode because you weren't allowed. i got a lot :)

we then made our way over the Millenium Bridge (any Harry Potter fans? this is the bridge that the dementors fuck up in the 6th movie in the very beginning--I'm famous!) and into the Tate Modern Museum. We walked through an exhibit called "States of Flux" that had cool pop art by Andy Warhol, some Picasso and Matisse, some AMAZING photograph collections, and other dope stuff.

We then continued our trek along the South Bank of the Thames and saw all the huge historic buildings as we made our way towards Parliament and Big Ben! THEN we walked over to Leicester Square near Picadilly Circus for LES MISERABLES! I hadn't read the book since 10th grade or something and honestly, who would understand that book when they were 15 years old, so I was little foggy on some of the details but the music was UNREAL (I dreamed a dream anyone? here's lookin at you, Glee!) Despite the fact that I was exhausted and only moderately refreshed from my dinner at "Bella Italia"--a quasi delicious moderately priced Italian restaurant on the same street as the theater (let's be real, the restaurant was chosen because no one could feel their feet and it was about 4 steps away)--I was soooooo impressed by the musical. Except for the dude who played "Marius." he sucked. his vibrato "sounded like a bleating goat" as Becca puts it and she's quite right. It was distracting and goat-like and I really wished he'd stop but alas, main characters tend to sing a lot.

I was so tired when we got back to school that I tried to use my Oyster card (the card I bought for the month to use on the Tube) instead of my school i.d. to swipe in. it did not work.

so now I'm tired. and would like to go to bed. and hopefully with not get chemicals in my mouth. more tomorrow! (we're going to see The Crucible in Regent's Park's theaterrrr!)

missing you all from home. wish I could squeeze every one of you. CK.

and then he came back with 6 shots...

yesterday was generally absurd. i think we woke up around 9:30ish but as jetlag was still kicking my ass and I hadn't fallen asleep until after 3 again the night before, I promptly shoved several bowls of cheerios in my mouth and pretended to read my summer reading until I passed out in the sunshine on Liz's lawnchair for an hour. I then became overheated and demanded to be moved into her living room where I read 3 more pages and slept until 12:30. there IS a solution to this madness and it's called going to sleep earlier but since that didn't happen until last night, and even then not before 1:30, I have been that annoying sleepy friend who, much like a baby, can't function properly without naps. or in this case comas. sorry, Liz.

we then went on a trip into town to get groceries for dinner! it was very exciting. since, as Elizabeth correctly pointed out, all things English seem "cuter and smarter" to Americans, I was loving everything at this grocery store (called Waitrose), including containers for soup, salad dressing, and bottles of soda. we successfully got everything we needed and returned home for lunch and more napping. then when her mom came home--from the 6-7 mile hike that Liz and I said we were going to do but then reneged on when she woke us up at 8:45am--she said she needed to go back into town. to the grocery store. but obviously I was so eager to see more cute food items that I jumped at the opportunity. but then when we got home again and started making the world's most delectable dinner ever (Gaspatcho soup, corn and tomato salad, and potato latkes, with Pim's to drink), we realized we needed MORE THINGS! back to Waitrose!! "Liz do you have the list?" "Yeah!" 5 minutes later..."Liz do you have the list?" "I do." Pulling into Waitrose. "Liz can I have the list?" Searching of pockets...more frantically now...we're pulling off the seatbelt to lift up our butts...getting out of the car to search better for what is clearly not there...No list. bummer. made the trip 30 seconds longer than it would have been with the list but Liz felt bad. good thing she rebounds quickly.

dinner was the most incredible meal ever. I couldn't believe we had made it all! we ate outside because it was such a nice night and when Mama B got really really antsy and couldn't sit still any longer Liz and I got ready to go out with her bffs!!

Sabrina picked us up from Liz's house because we wanted to carpool if people were drinking. She was beautiful and I quickly adored her. so tiny, and has the most precious laugh you've ever heard. They had their doorway reunion (and I got a hug too!) and then Mama came in to say hello and then said "So we're cool with drinking and driving?" to which Sabrina responded "uhhh, well no, I'm not cool with it. but...uhh..." Pretty sure Mom meant "we're cool with rides so that no one will be drinking and driving" but she'd had a long day. just an fyi: NO ONE is "cool" with it.

So we pranced back over the The Running Mare pub from a few nights earlier (which as you might recall had been filled with kids from Liz's high school). Since last night was a Friday, there was a different crowd. older one might say. a little less tame. we took our drinks outside to wait for the 4th member of our party, Jackie, as known as the funniest girl I've ever met. maybe it was the accent, maybe it was the British humour, or maybe she really is the funniest girl who ever lived, but I loved her. The Liz, Sabrina, Jackie Combo is a deadly one. best company of all time. once it got really cool outside and I started getting eaten alive but the mosquitos I didn't think lived in the UK (typical), we moved inside to a table by the bar. Everything was pretty standard until around 11:15 when "Max" showed up. he waltzed right up to our table, sat at a chair a few feet away and just stared. the four of us exchanged suspicious glances. "I'm FUCKed!" says Max. "I mean. not SO fucked that I can't converse, you know. But like, I've had a reasonable amount to drink tonight." ugh. We (mostly Liz and Jackie) humoured him for about 8 minutes until he started getting grumpy--he'd make the next asinine comment and we'd all laugh at him. He started getting really self-conscious and whenever one of us wasn't facing him he'd go "WUH AW YOU SAYING? WHY AW YOU LOFFING?" he'd make half-hearted attempts to get up and go because he thought we hated him (we did) and then he'd stop two steps away and come back and sit down, this time in a stool closer to our table, and continue to babble. go away, Max.

then it got better. Max's dad was also at the bar and was "more FUCKed than he was." max waived over papa bear. "Wuh aw you foive buhds (birds) doing heh?" There were 4 of us girls so I'm assuming he was trying to make a joke and include his son as a bird (a woman).

ha.

ha.

Max had moved into the booth next to Jackie and Sabrina. no touching, Max. but dad was funny, when I could understand him through the drunk and his accent. but then he found out I was American. we had a brief one-sided conversation where he told me that I was only self-conscious about being American because I was American. that being fairly obvious to me, I said mostly nothing. then he asked me "whereabouts the US? Michigan?" Virginia. "OHHHHH VUHGEENIUHHH." yes. (then saw my nose ring.) "is that a real little ring there, in your nose? like a real little...what have you." yes. "well, that's not very Michigan!" Virginia. "that's not very Virginia. you little radical." uh, right. he then badgered me for about 4 minutes what I would like to drink. at this point it is 11:40 and the bar had booted us around 11:30 last time so I didn't think I should have another drink just to have to leave (also I did not care for a drink, least not from mr. laughs over here). I settled with "I have no preference and I think we're leaving soon." dad disappears....

Liz: Omg Chelsea. you're gonna die when you see this.

Through the reflection in the glass I can see that dad is carrying a tray. What can that mean!?!?

He sets it down on the table and it contains 6 shots of a bright green liquid. absinthe? no. Green Sours, shots that "taste like Stahburst. only appley." if you have ever met me, you will know that I do not consume alcohol in the form of a shot. it simply is not so and has not been so for several years. I am averse to the idea so much so that few members of the SAM fraternity at UVA respect me fully and pressure me fully. and yet, I haven't let it happen.

last night. it happened. lucky for me, the shots really did taste like apple starbursts (self-determined through a sniff and a small sip). lucky for me because I truly believe that if I hadn't taken it Max and his dad would have screamed at me or something and who really wants to deal with a drunk and angry Englishman and his socially adept son on their first Friday abroad? not me. i took the shot, got a "nice lips" from the dad (ew), and moments later something offended Max and he finally did storm away. peace, sucka. apparently dad was done making comments about my lips and on to promoting his son because he spent the next 5 minutes jabbering on in drunk about his son's chef job (I'm pretty sure he serves food at a University dining hall) and the languages he speaks (4 supposedly, but that seems doubtful). I told him I didn't really care what languages his son spoke because the kid was too cranky. "Want me to get him back for you?" no. I don't want you to do that. "I'll go get him back for you." time to go. we get the quick advice to "LEG IT!" from a partially concerned citizen sitting at the bar who must have observed the awkward last half hour and we sprinted out a back door to the car. we hid inside it with the lights off (because we were waiting for Jackie's mom) and were all very quiet and very fearful to be discovered. then a boy dressed much like Max (it was Max) sprinted into the bushes right near our car. creepy!? trying to find us!? no. trying to pee in the bushes. only facing the parking lot instead of the shrubbery. definitely creepy.

the night ended, again, with Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream. with a hint of sour apple.

you just used three british expressions in that explanation...

it's started. my incessant love for mimicking all the sounds around me has already resulted in me beginning to converse using British expressions. what a champ. me:London::peanut butter:jelly.

but wait. that was only a few hours ago. and i've been naughty. it only took me one day to crap out on my fancy new blog. lucky for you 2 busy days = plenty to share. so let's rewind.

yesterday was my first real day here and elizabeth allowed me to sleep until 11:30am. i am ashamed. but i needed it? i was up until 2:30 england time writing to you kids, too amped up on airplane drinks and blog fever to sleep. liz's mom bought us sandwiches (veggie because she respects my decision to care for the earth's creatures) and we powered through them and approximately 11,000 grapes in the 22 degree weather. yes. that's right. you heard me, 22 degrees. Celsius. because that's how we roll here. (22 Celsius is about 75 degrees Fahrenheit. crazy warm for England.)

during the day I got to see the lovely little town that is Cobham, where Liz lives, and then we went to Shere. apparently this is where the movie "The Holiday" was filmed but since I neither appreciate nor support the careers of Jack Black or Cameron Diaz, and even sometimes speak blasphemously of Jude Law, I refused to let their associations with the town spoil my day.

This is honestly one of the cutest towns you've ever seen. Every house and shop looks like a gingerbread house, only the kind that's too adorable to eat.

not only is this a magical town but it's also home to a creek and lots of fields, so we went for a walk where I met lambs and horses and stinging nettles, and got to see beautiful flowers and creepy trees! we went on a lovely little nature walk before cooling off at The Lucky Duck.

There are some things you should know before you ever enter The Lucky Duck. for starters, be aware that some people are extremely comfortable with overemphasizing their shop's theme. In this instance, it is guaranteed that you will be suffocated by all things duck-like including but not limited to: ducks on wallpaper, paintings of ducks, paintings of ducks on the wall, miscellaneous wall duck fixtures, duck menu images, stuffed ducks (let your mind imagine what I mean here), carved wooden ducks, paper mache ducks, ceiling hangings of ducks, and duck references in the shop's sign-age. Sounds adorable? not adorable. way too much. also Elizabeth asked the waitress for a "refreshing tea" to which she given the response "ehhhh......wuhh?" she had no clue what we meant. so we (I) wisely chose orange and we skidaddled before I could consume any of the pound cake.

being in such an adorable place really tuckered us out so we enjoyed a little break with the "tele" (t.v.) which included Modern Family and some Glee that I missed. MF is the bomb. Glee is actually kind of ridiculous, but I'll watch it until a crucial character leaves the show, their counterpart falls to pieces, someone gets cancer, another person dies, and seven new characters are introduced. hate you too, Grey's Anatomy.

after I accidentally fell asleep for half an hour liz woke me up and we went to The Mare, her favorite pub in town where she confidently proclaimed that she would "either know everyone at this bar or no one." cocky lady. She knew everyone. liked few. the kids there were in a grade below her and she hadn't kept in touch with any of them. One conversation went a little something like this: "Oh, hey, Liz." "HEYYY!! how are you!?" "Pretty good, and you?" "GOOD! good. When did you get back!?!?" "Uh... I never left..." (Silence.) coooooooooooooooool.

then 2 of her friends from hs rolled up and we became best friends and the night ended in literal darkness when the bar turned off the electricity and we were unceremoniously removed.

Today we went to Brighton Beach on the coast. "Beach" is deceiving. True, we were on the edge of a body of water, but I sat on a rock the size of my miniature schnauzer and whenever you breathed all the disgustingly dirty rocks made crinkle sounds. ew. thank god for hand sanitizer. on your legs. it was actually a good time though. it was like 78 degrees and everyone (who didn't have work/school--aka hoodrats) was on the beach (rockbed)--I can make your bed rock?

There were 2 piers, one of which burned down 50 years ago and was rusting in the water, and another which we walked on. We got a "box of chips" also known as french fries and a large (which means small anywhere except obesity capital America). there were ice cream shops ever 6 steps (until we decided we wanted ice cream and then there were none) and lots of arcade games. looked a lot like an east coach beach towns only with attractive British people instead of inbred townies. after getting lost in the parking lot for 30 minutes we headed back to Cobham. i fell asleep DJ-ing my iPod. not cool.

you might be saying: woah, Chels! what a day. you drove an hour and half each way to a crazy fun beach, laid in the sunshine, stuffed your face with french fries, and took a snooze to fleetwood mac! busy busy bee. but wait. there's more.

tonight i made my first venture into London. Elizabeth's "mum" sings in the London Symphony Choir, and we went to watch their rehearsal. there are no words for how amazing these 80ish men and women sound. they blew me away. i was tearing up in the back of the church, clutching their sheet music in my hand. any opportunity you have to see these people perform would be time well spent. DO it.

liz and i bopped over to an italian restaurant for some zza and balls of dough known formally as "dough balls". one small taste of an entire clove of garlic posing itself as "garlic butter" and 4 glasses of wine later, liz and I were quite chatty and I quickly learned that the word "fanny" is not, in fact, a cute Disneyish way of referring to your butt, but actually, in England, means "the C word" and to never use it, ever. It's rated R and not good for dinner conversation. i probably shouldn't even have repeated this story the word is so "nosty."

we split up with her mum after dinner and went over to Southbank where we got drinks at a restaurant called Giraffe. there was no obvious reason why the restaurant was named such. the only outward giraffe expressions were the amateur giraffe drawings on the backs of the waiter's t-shirts. i'm just grateful the owners weren't as enthusiastic as our friends back at The Lucky Duck.

I fell in love for the 47th recorded time since I landed in England 48 hours ago. this time it happened with the Giraffe waiter with the Mohawk. not your standard Mohawk either. one that allows the shorter part of one's hair to grow to the length of the average male's and the long part to extend one foot into the air, held up by gel. or glue. or whatever schmexy mohawked boys use here. doesn't matter.

around 11:15 we got the train back into the 'burbs and sadly i left without Giraffe-boy. I can only hope there will be more...

until tomorrow. or the next day.

you can't make me sleep yet, jetlag.

alright so listen. i've noticed these blogs are getting rather popular and by that I mean I personally know 2 people who write them, the guy who sells my dad's apartment building's son has one, and I saw that movie with Meryl Streep and the sprightly redhead. I'm going to be in Europe for over a month and I am an English major AND we have to keep a diary of our trip anyway, so I figured I'd jump on the bandwagon.

**despite the fact that I'm usually pretty competitive, I'd like to suggest to anyone bored enough to read mine that you also check out my (wannabe) Irish friend Margaret's blog at http://greeceitw.blogspot.com/2010/05/herro-from-athens.html. she may be the funniest person i've ever met/read. it's worth your time.**

this blog could potentially have a lot of good stuff going on. for starters, I arrived in London this evening (afternoon for you blokes back in the States) and will be here for the next 5-ish weeks. and even if all I do is post pictures--can you even do that on here?--it would be pretty 'ill'. to be honest I don't have too many assumptions quite yet. not that i'm one of those people who goes into things with zero expectations and an abysmal outlook so that when moderately cool things happen I can write on someone's facebook wall to brag and call it a day. I just figure whatever is going to happen here is gonna be pretty rad and my predictions will most likely be significantly outdone.

some things i hope will happen:

- meet a british rockstar, mingle, become pen pals, live in sin for 15 years until he meets someone younger, or something similar.

- meet one person who sounds like a "bee-ull". (A Beatle. obviously.)

- get a cool european haircut, up my street cred.

- take a nerdy picture of me at platform 9 and 3/4. (this has been promised to me). if you don't know what I mean, climb out from under that rock and read a book. and start with Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone.

- watch a World Cup game at a pub. this will obviously happen. i'm in London. and it's World Cup season. USA USA USA.

- come back to the states with a fake English accent. take over the world.

some things i hope won't happen:

- loss of any items: expensive, sentimental, or otherwise. thievery is neither cute nor tolerated. it's illegal, and seriously awkward, especially if caught. if you take my shit, I will report you to the police and post it on my fun new blog and everyone will know what you did. as a disclaimer to any readers, there is always the potential that I will lose my own things, in which case I will blame it either on a fictitious thief or "that night when I was soooooooo wastedddddd." guess you'll never know.

- the death of my computer. while i realize that the fan is probably broken and that my refusing to turn the damn thing off in its first 3 years of life strong increases the imminence of my lil comp's final days, that would suck.

- excessively hot or excessively cold weather. warm weather is welcome, especially if I get tan, but if it exceeds 90 degrees, I'll be pissed. if it's cold the whole time I'm here, I'll freeze, and bitch at my mom for making me unpack my $20 forever 21 jeans.

- anything that happened in the movie Taken.

some things that have already happened:

- hearing on the over-com at Heathrow that one "Phillip Phillipoo (sp?)" is being summoned at Gate whatever because his flight is about to leave without him. tough life in so many ways, Phil.

- sightings of a double-decker red bus and a black taxi. check and check.

- getting lost for over an hour and a half with Elizabeth because we got rerouted on the highway.

- eating 1/2 of a box of Special K with Almonds during said rerouting

- quickly falling in love with Liz's adorable mom.

- missing my own mom already, just a little.

- you too, dad.

- attempting to write a moderately funny first blog on Liz's laptop. the keys are different than mine. it's taken 4 hours. not goin so well.

so.

I guess I'm just hoping this will be the best trip ever. and I'm jk, Liam Neeson, you're invited! still not quite tired but based on the "fun o meter" of this posting I'm assuming that I'll get about 8 minutes into the book I'm supposed to be reading (because yes, I'm technically here to study abroad) and be bored to sleep.

Miss you already, Virginia! (no I don't. and I probably never will.)